Hello, and welcome to John Oleksowicz Dot Com.

I am John. This is my website. Welcome!

The original idea for this website was, "Maybe I should have a website." That vision has morphed and evolved over time, and now it's more like, "Maybe I never should have made a website."

If you're reading this, my first assumption is that you're probably lost. If that's the case I hope you'll accept my apologies. I hope you don't feel obligated to read any more of my website, and I promise I won't be offended if you hit that back button and leave right now. Take care!

If you're not lost, it stands to reason that you came here on purpose. What an odd thing to do! You'll have to excuse my curiosity, but who are you? Why would you possibly be reading this?

You've got some explaining to do.

Explain Yourself

Ok, so I couldn't help but notice that you're continuing to read my website without explaining yourself, and y'know what, I get it. It's totally understandable. I'd probably do the same thing if confronted with a form like that.

I forgive you.

Frequently Asked Questions

My Most Popular Posts*

* There is only one popular post on this website. There will only ever be the one. Please also note that the changing color effect I used for the header of this section is objectively very cool and no one can tell me otherwise.